Today ohhhh today....

Today was kind of a somber but bittersweet day for me. I thought about the passing of my grandfather this morning and how shocked and upset that the Lord would take him away from me so fast without me being able to say goodbye. Last year I felt like I lost a huge part of my life. I would always turn to my grandfather if times were tough and he was always good at giving me advice. This whole year I was upset because I felt the doctors could have done more to help him. I often go to sleep and wake up thinking about him and how I miss him so much. Sometimes when I'm driving and my kids talk about Pa I will just be sad and start to cry. I know the pain will continue but I know it will subside as the days come closer knowing that I can be with him again. Today I tried to go through the day as fast as possible and try to do things that would make me not think about the passing and I did good until I started writing and reading a wonderful note my husband wrote to me. I felt I needed to express my love for my grandfather because he is/was a very important part of my life. I am grateful for the gosple of Jesus Christ and that he is willing to let my family be together forever. I am grateful that I can be with my family forever. I never thought my life would be like how it is and I am so incredibly grateful for the trials that I have gone through because I feel it only makes me stronger in the end. I know that I am Jesus loves me and that He forgives me for the mistakes I have made. I am who I am and I can't change what I have done. I have a loving husband who takes care of me and is proud to be my husband. I love him with all that I have and all that I can give. I want him to know that and I want the whole blogosphere readers to know that. We struggle daily but I know that when I put my head on the pillow at night I know I have an eternal husband who loves me and will never judge me. I am proud to be a mother of three beautiful spiritual gifted children. I WILL always try to do my best to be a better mother. I know I have my faults and I loose patience with them but at night they are my precious angels sent from above. I always have to thank the missionaries for blessing me with the gospel. They are my light and love and I admire the sacrifice and love they have for the gospel. They have made my life a better life. YES YOU JEN since I know you are one of my blog readers ;) ;). In closing I love my life, I love who I am. I won't ever change who I am. I'm ME!